THE VALUE OF TIME, PATIENCE AND PERSEVERANCE IN NEGOTIATIONS

I recently mediated two very difficult disputes in which not only did the disputants themselves believe that any resolution was eternally elusive (not uncommon), but even I, as mediator had very little hope (very uncommon)! It appeared that the parties were about to terminate mediation on numerous occasions, when one or the other stormed out of the mediation session, threatening onerous law suits on their way out.

Ultimately, to my astonishment, both disputes were not only resolved to the satisfaction of the parties, but relationships were restored to some extent as well. In my post-mediation debrief, I realized that key factors that helped to advance resolution on these seemingly intractable conflicts between apparently intransigent disputants, was time, patience and perseverance.

Consider the negotiation between a buyer and prospective seller over the purchase of a piece of real estate. The seller was resisting any offer the buyer was proposing despite displaying a clear intent in wanting to sell.The buyer perceived the seller to be greedy, unreasonable and unrealistic, and assumed her motivations were entirely money driven. The negotiations were at an impasse. The buyer, faced with this impasse, was at his wits end and about to walk away from this deal.